1. Boobs weigh more than you think.
2. It takes a LOT of practice to wear high heels.
3. Plus, they make your calves hurt. SO BAD.
4. Have you ever poked your eye with eyeliner?
5. One word: childbirth.
6. Guys expect us to shave our legs every single day. That’s a lot of chances to cut yourself.
7. Cramps. Trust us, they’re that bad.
8. At least we’re tough enough to just give up and ask for directions.
9. We have to put up with you guys in fifth grade, pulling our pig tails and making fun of the “early bloomers”.
10. It’s hard to get your makeup just right.
11. We have to sit there and listen to those douches telling us that girls should just stay in the kitchen.
12. Have YOU ever burned yourself on a straightener/curling iron?
13. Society tells us to be “ladylike”. It’s not fun to have to hold back everything that makes you human to keep up this image of quiet, happy perfection.
14. We bleed for a week, non-stop, 12 weeks a year, and don’t die. We are bad-ass.
15. It hurts to pluck your eyebrows!
16. Watching your weight is stressful!
17. Bikini season.
18. Thongs. You try wearing one.
20. We spend most of our lives obsessing over you guys.
21. Try getting something waxed, then see if you still think it doesn’t hurt that much.
23. Most of the time, guys aren’t the ones getting raped.
24. You can walk away. We’re stuck there with the unplanned(sorry guys!) baby in our stomach.
25. You try juggling kids, a career, money issues, hygiene, a whiny husband, cooking, cleaning, laundry, possibly some health issue, and a social life.
26. If you heard some of the things teenage girls say about each other, you’d be upset too.
27. Yeah, we live longer, but that just means we have to sit there while our husbands, brothers, and other friends die.
28. Guys can get by on four shirts and two pairs of pants. If girls tried to do that, chances are the people around us would notice. And comment.
29. If a guy screws twenty girls in three months, he’s a legend. If a girl screws two guys in three months, she’s a whore.
30.Even if we do the exact same job as you, and do it better, we STILL get paid less.
31. With about a million hormones coursing through our bodies at any given point, you still expect us not to “be total bitches”
[tastes red liquid]
The Doctor: Yep, blood. Human blood. A positive… with just a dash of iron. Agh. That means… Blood control. Blood Control! Oh, I haven’t seen blood control for years! So you’re controlling all the A positives. WHich leaves us with a great, big, stinkin’ problem. I really don’t know who I am. I don’t know when to stop. So if I see a great, big, threatening button which should never ever ever be pressed, then I just want to do this.
[presses button]” —The Doctor, The Christmas Invasion (2005)